Connections

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Have you played the New York Times Connections game?

Each day, 16 words are presented in a 4X4 grid. The object of the game is to arrange the words in four rows, each representing a distinct category. It’s challenging, forcing players to think about alternative possible connections between words. Here’s an example: 

And here’s the answer:

The daily word puzzles range from moderately easy to difficult. You can play Connections here. 

Observing connections is also a therapeutic life practice. It brings us into the moment, requiring us to stop, look, and listen, reinforcing that the world doesn’t revolve around us and that we are part of an intricate web of existence. 

I began a connections practice 20 years ago. Over time, it dramatically changed my outlook on life. My practice started with nature before progressing to inner presence.

Connections In Nature

Nature is like a large orchestra performing a symphony. Despite constant interruptions and change, the performance is always in tune. I noticed this at our lakeshore cabin in NW, Wisconsin when I began keeping a weekly diary of seasonal observations. 

Over time, I noticed that first observations, like the emergence of trilliums in the Spring, hearing a loon call, or seeing a swallowtail butterfly, happened the same week each year. As I added first sightings to my diary, a picture emerged. Nothing happens in isolation; nothing stands alone. Such utter consistency triggered an epiphany: everything is connected. I already knew that at some level, but witnessing community emerge from the jigsaw puzzle of nature significantly impacted my perspective. It caused me to wonder about my life, and where I was connected. 

I was studying Buddhist philosophy at the time. Two tenets of the philosophy troubled me. The first claimed there was no such thing as a separate independent Self. The second posited that the journey of enlightenment progressed from “I” to “We” to “One.” I had no idea what that meant. Witnessing connections in nature broadened my understanding.

The universe is connected in ways we don’t fully understand. According to Einstein’s theory of relativity, light travels at the universe’s speed limit. Nevertheless, carefully designed physics experiments demonstrate faster-than-light communications over vast distances. How can that be? Perhaps the universe is one?  

The seemingly separate Self originates from one’s perspective. The more narrow that perspective, the greater the feeling of isolation. Our perspective changes as awareness broadens and we tune into the expansive connectivity of the natural world. Doing so enhances meaning and belonging.

Inevitably, my connection practice stimulated more questions. What about connections that transcend physical boundaries, like the felt presence of deceased parents, dear friends, and loved ones?  I am not religious in a traditional sense, but the connective energy between people feels Spiritual. What is the essence of that energy? 

My religious upbringing instructed that Spirituality was a matter of faith and belief. I never resonated with that. It seemed too narrow. Looking deeply within myself I was ready to examine Spirituality from a new perspective, namely, connections felt on the inside.

Connections With Inner Presence

I wasn’t sure how to begin, so I turned to the world’s great philosophers, theologians, and Spiritual leaders. Rising before dawn, I immersed myself in wisdom literature. It was a difficult period in my life. I was lost and searching for happiness resilient to difficult circumstances. 

My inner connections practice consisted of rising  before dawn, reading for 30 minutes, and then letting go of thought and sitting in stillness to allow the material to sink in. I would close by journaling my thoughts. This continued over a number of years. During that time, my journal grew to over a thousand pages. Later, I would learn this practice had a name, Lectio Divina (Latin for “Divine Reading”). Lectio Divina is a traditional monastic practice of scriptural reading, meditation and prayer intended to promote communion with God. I found that fascinating because even in absence of religious intention the practice was transformative.

Over time, a new Spirituality emerged. A Spirituality expressed by energy bringing the world together. Perhaps this is the same energy some experience through belief. I am at a loss to define it, but it is actively experienced as love.

The Austrian Jewish philosopher Martin Buber was famous for expounding on the nature of inner dialogue. He described two types of relationships: the “I-It” relationship, say with a tool, and the “I-Thou” relationship with a dear friend. The “I-Thou” relationship is catalyzed by a mysterious connective energy. It feels Spiritual. The American Philosopher Ken Wilber describes it as “the miracle of we.”

Spiritual connections require stillness and listening. For some, this occurs in church services; for me, it manifests in contemplative practice, when my tiny drop of Self is released into a vast ocean of being. 

The journey toward peace indeed progresses from “I” to “We” to “One.” I don’t have a name to give this, but it manifests as a pull to union. The beauty of this experience is that it is free from dogma, and available to anyone willing to stop, deeply look, and quietly listen. 

New connections are the basis for new thoughts that broaden our perspective. Look for something new each day. Don’t assume you know what it is. Look with beginner’s eyes. This is powerful because perspective illuminates our outlook on life. Self is our default perspective; survival requires that. But Self can also be a prison. Directly witnessing the vast sea of connectivity liberates natural self-centeredness and enriches one’s life.  

The New York Times Connections game is a fun distraction. Connections as a life practice are emancipating.  

I’ll close with William Blake:

“If the doors of perception were cleansed every thing would appear to man as it is, infinite.”

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