The Secret Within: Chapter 14, Practicing Silent Fitness

The Secret Within is a book I’m writing about the art of finding happiness and peace amidst personal difficulties. 

This is the 14th installment. Previous installments can be found here.

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14. Practicing Silent Fitness

In an axiom of Western philosophy, Descartes famously wrote, “I think, therefore I am.” Our true essence, however, runs deeper than thought. Awareness precedes thought. However, it is typically ignored, leaving self-referential thought in control of our lives.

This is a problem.

Self-referential thoughts, the movies we play in our heads, cause most of our stress. Silent Fitness is gained by letting go of these thoughts and bringing our attention to awareness. As awareness increases, self-referential thoughts hold less sway, reducing stress. Thus, Silent Fitness is an essential component of emotional well-being. 

After graduating from college, we arranged for our daughter to live with a friend’s grandparents for three months in Pune, India. While there, she took private meditation lessons with a yogi. 

The yogi began his instruction with the breath. The average person takes twenty-two thousand breaths daily, but how many do we notice? After a month, I asked Julia how her meditation lessons were going. She was frustrated, telling me the yogi was obsessed with the breath. He told her that meditation training could not progress until she mastered it. It turned out that her lessons never progressed beyond the breath.

Awareness contains depths most have never visited. The yogi attempted to demonstrate this by instructing Julia to focus on the breath. I relay this story not to indicate where to start a silent fitness practice but to emphasize the importance of foundational awareness, which most of us take for granted. 

There are many ways to begin a silent fitness practice; the most important thing is to find an approach that resonates with you. For some, step-by-step instructions from a book will be helpful. For others, guided audio tutorials help. Some find a “sitting meditation” practice to be best. Others will resonate with more active approaches. Finding the best practice is like finding a restaurant you enjoy. Type “mindfulness exercises” in the search bar and put Google to work to pick one that resonates with you.

Watching the breath is not helpful for me. I use an approach adapted from multiple sources. 

Here are the steps:

Sitting Meditation

Preparation

1. Download a free meditation timer app to use during practice. This will prevent being distracted by wondering when practice time is over. 

2. Find a quiet place where you will not be disturbed. Initially, I used noise-canceling headphones to minimize auditory distractions. 

3.  Select a short inspirational phrase that can be silently repeated during the practice. 

4. Decide on a practice duration (I recommend twenty minutes).

Practice Steps

1. Dim the room lights and sit erect on the floor with your back against soft furniture or a pillow. Bow your head slightly and softly close your eyes. Allow your arms to rest on your lap. The traditional approach of touching the thumb to the middle finger on each hand is helpful. 

2. Begin the practice with slow cleansing breaths while silently repeating your phrase.

7. Focus entirely on the phrase. Repeat it, allowing thoughts to float away. When your mind drifts into thoughts, don’t try to stop them; acknowledge their presence and return your focus to the phrase.  

8. Refrain from evaluating how you are doing; simply stick with the practice for the allotted time.  

7. Continue this practice for at least 40 consecutive days.

8. As letting go of thoughts and focusing on the phrase becomes easier, you may transition to another practice I call the color practice (my preferred approach). 

9. The color practice brings focus to the light coming through your translucent, softly closed eyelids. Watching this light, you may find it dances in changing patterns and intensities. The light may exhibit subtle colors, like the Northern Lights. As focus increases and the mind slows down, the color of the light may change; I notice red yielding to orange, yellow, green, blue, and finally indigo. Don’t worry if you do not see colors; every person’s practice is unique. If your mind wanders, as it undoubtedly will, softly return your attention to the light.

11. If you feel bodily sensations during practice, like pressure in the forehead or cramping in the legs, note it and softly return your focus to the light. 

12. As your mind becomes quiet, you may feel the sensation of falling. If this happens, accept the sensation and relax into it.

Summary

The essential elements of the above practices are letting go of thoughts and centering attention. It’s harder than it sounds. Initially, I found attempts to do this frustrating. However, my frustration provided useful learning by teaching me that having expectations for how my practice should progress was counterproductive. I now enter all practices expectation-free. Some go better than others—that’s OK! Practicing with an open heart is essential.

Sitting meditation was different than anything I previously attempted. Rather than acquiring a new skill, it was a process of subtraction, like peeling back an onion. Thoughts are sticky and hard to let go of. Consider the analogy of driving a car. The car represents your thoughts. You may want to stop the car but soon find it has no brakes. Your only option is to take your foot off the gas and allow the car to come to a rest. This takes time.

Sitting meditation is only one of many Silent Fitness practices. The key to Silent Fitness is to find a practice that resonates with you and fits your lifestyle. The meditation process may seem daunting, but don’t be discouraged. You’re probably more familiar with Silent Fitness than you realize. Have you ever paused and taken a few deep cleansing breaths when stressed out? Did you feel more relaxed afterward? This is a simple example of a Silent Fitness practice. 

Rather than setting goals and tracking progress, use your practice as an opportunity to unplug. Permit yourself to relax into the simple feeling of being alive. If you decide to practice sitting meditation, remember that posture is critical. If you don’t sit erect, you will probably fall asleep. 

Compulsive thinking stresses us out! Silent fitness teaches us how to  “Be” without thought. In time, it becomes easier to witness emotions rather than be consumed by them. As you continue to practice, you may find it increasingly natural to become still. One day, you may completely let go of your thoughts and relax into pure awareness. This is a bigger deal than you might imagine.

Merging Silent Fitness With Life

After practicing sitting meditation for several years, I began searching for a practice that didn’t require a special time and location. I wanted to find one I could engage in throughout my day. 

Relax and Be Aware by Sayadaw U Tejaniya and Doug McGill provided the perfect solution. This book contains 31 exercises, one for each day of the month, that bring Silent Fitness into everyday life. Each practice centers on an area of focus. Here are a few examples:

-Check yourself often. Are you tense or relaxed?

-Don’t exert. Just pay attention. Let experiences come as they may.

-As much as you can, be aware! Each moment is critical. 

-Check your attitude. You are not practicing to get something. 

The exercises helped me to experience life as a Movie Director watching a scene rather than an actor playing a role. This helped to avoid getting caught up in emotional dramas. Relax and Be Aware brought Silent Fitness off the meditation cushion and into my life. 

Here is how I put it to use:  

-First, I condensed the daily practices to an easily remembered phrase I could return to throughout the day.

-Second, I initiated brief one-minute practices whenever I got irritated or upset. This was hard! 

-Third, I watched how the practice changed the quality of my awareness. 

I first completed the thirty-one-day routine while experiencing a serious family medical issue. It’s hard to practice under duress, but it turned out to be the best time. Each practice took only a minute or so, enabling me to engage them repeatedly throughout the day. The value came from repetition rather than intensity. 

I noticed a big difference in the quality of my awareness after each practice, especially when I was disturbed. The practices helped me face our situation with a clear mind and open heart.

Sayadaw U Tejaniya’s exercises reveal that awareness is a source of wisdom that guides our lives. There is no need to pursue this wisdom; wisdom ensures as we learn to witness awareness. 

“Once we know how to learn from life itself 

and not our thoughts and concepts

Life quite naturally begins to go well.“

-Sayadaw U Tejaniya

I found this to be true. 

Silent Fitness isn’t easy. Like mental and physical fitness, it requires dedicated effort for extended periods. The practices detailed above became an important part of my life. They inspired my development of the Stop, Accept, and Renew practice covered in Chapter 4. This practice, in addition to sitting meditation, is my current approach. 

In the next chapter, I will detail Silent Fitness’s impact on my life. 

Awareness is a superpower we all possess! This is the secret within!

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Installments of The Secret Within can be found here. 

Former blog posts can be found here by subject category and here chronologically. 

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My first book, Towards A Life Well-Lived, can be purchased by clicking this link. Proceeds from sales are donated to Peace In Schools, a Portland, Oregon-based organization supporting mindfulness training in high schools.